What do you do when you are told you are to blame for things, that things are your fault, when you disagree? My only responses ( after inevitably failing an initial plea with logical explanation or just voicing disagreement) seem to be:
1. Consider I must be wrong, become depressed about what an awful person I am to be at such fault without even realising it.
2. Set about proving that it is not my fault, by displaying necessary levels of pettiness, allowing for a moment of satisfaction before being told,what a terrible person I am to do that, becone depressed about being a bad person, unworthy of self defense.
3. Ignore it. Then be told I’m irresponsible, dismissive, inconsiderate, become depressed about being a horrible inconsiderate blameworthy person failing to take responsibility for their actions.
If someone blames me then I am blamed: a defensive and sad place to he. No good ever comes of this. Not one iota.
Yet it keeps on coming around uninvited to my waking life.
What is the need to blame? It is a dysfunctional, unproductive set of roles, rousing only bitterness and sadness.
When asked how I felt about recent events, I said I was disappointed in general, but accepted it. I was dogged until I pinpointed the people I was most disappointed with and asked why I refuse to blame them….well, it’s just how they are, behaviour is a product of conditioning, and people have limits, I accept these, and though I cant help but feel a little disappointed, I can forgive that, I can accept it and move on…why can’t others respect my choice to live this way? It has been so hard to replace blame with understanding and consideration but I’m happy with that change…why do others have to try and drag me backwards? 😦