I’m incapable of taking an eyetest and not all news is good news

My left eye is a menace. It refuses to behave in eye tests so I’ve been to the optician 4 times during my ‘holiday’ and have had new glasses made twice; I’m still not convinced that the correction is right. I’m to give it another few days before I’m allowed a third test with a more experienced optometrist….I’m getting all the spiel from the regular staff about adjustment periods etc while I’m sat there wondering just how far away they are from my face and how bad the cross eyedness will be when I remove them this time. The first left lens was the wrong power and I suspect the second has a marginally wrong axis or centre of vision does not align, or, y’know, both, or neither. Lets face it, I don’t like change. 

The staff clearly think I’m some kind of nutter…the way this should work is, you get your new glasses, accept everything’s been done perfectly and just deal with the headaches, you don’t tell them all about it for god’s sake, and not repeatedly! I hope they are right and I don’t fall off my bike tomorrow.

What a nice headache-inducing way to spend my time off work. Sigh.


It was my intention to be creative these two weeks, make something, create something, but inspiration has not been abundant and playing ‘ori and the blind forest’ took precedent. I’m shite at computer games at the best of times, but one on a PC without a controller is well beyond my skill level even on easy.much swearing has passed. 

So instead I downloaded a karaoke app that lets you record yourself singing along to the songs on your phone. So I did that, and recordings  (so far only k’s choice) are only available for a laugh on request because I kind of hate my voice and don’t want it here for posterity. I will say though that it’s annoying how few contralto alternative, indie and (+/-pop-) rock singers there are out there to copy ;p


Also the depressed, anxious and otherwise unpredictable and neurotic dachshund who I was playing with, picking up and generally bonding with last week viciously bit the damned gardener on the leg on my birthday so considering her age and deteriorating behavioral problems, she was sadly wished all the best in her journey to the doggie afterlife 😦


It is upsetting but being small and cute doesn’t mean a dog is immune from being dangerous. Responsible dog ownership means making difficult decisions. In a weird way, I’ll miss my mum’s snappy, growly little fluffball, but not nearly as much as she will.


In other news, for a change and to build my confidence, I rode the Highland pony today while my friend rode ‘the beast’ that is Buster, but they were both like lazy angelic horses the whole ride so that was lovely and relaxing for all. 

Now thanks to said pony my knee injury that I’ve been trying to ignore for a few weeks is niggling again. Dammit. 34 and griping about my joints and singing karaoke at home alone. How did it come to this??? 


I am the contact lens optician’s dream…and other unnecessary information

I got a new phone. It does all kind of weird camera Things! Above is a photo taken from under a duvet…

Proof, as if I needed it, that I’m not unhealthily skinny any more.

I go to take a random labcoat..out of curiosity check the size (written on the pocket) male, middle aged colleague says
“YOU’LL never fit into THAT! you aren’t much smaller than me!

Proof that I don’t care that much…I wore it, it fitted ok but I’d usually go for S just for some extra arm length. This guy never saw me uber skinny and not eating, so he’s always seen me as healthy and normal, which, I suppose, is a win. I whinged to other lab members about his rudeness rather than getting upset.


I have, however gained a couple of pounds (as per dietetic instruction) and feel pretty physically awesome. I also bought a fleece for horse riding which only fitted in XS so up yours rude colleague, just because he looked entirely ridiculous in an XS labcoat!

As you can see I’m not procrastinating, oh no, not one bit. Well, maaaaybe I spent ten mins this morning listening to clips from ren and stimpy….

On a different topic alltogether, I went back to the optician re: contact lenses only to find the regular lady was away and I saw a crazy Russian lady instead. I explained on the phone to the annoying guy there, that I needed to get some more contacts so that the optician can check my vision with them in…so he tells me i need to pay them £35…erm….no…I need contact lenses first, Im not paying for aftercare when I have no product..

anywhoos I’m not sure if that lady believed my tale of this phone conversation, but regardless she examined my eyes – fluorescein and light and all that, then, to my dismay, she turned my lower eyelid inside out! I did the only sane thing anyone could do, which was jump back and ask what the heck she thought she was doing! she rolled here eyes in her mind and proceeded slightly against my will, to turn both eyelids inside out to look at them :(. We discussed my options – so, I want contacts, but I don’t want to have to wash them and re-use due to laziness / fear of contamination, I want my astigmatism corrected – so it has to be daily toric ones. Except, I want to be able to wear them for over 12 hours if necessary . Fine, what about high oxygen permeable Clariti? oh no, I can’t have those because I can’t get them out of my eyes, they get stuck….have I tried swiping downwards? eeeeew, no! that’s gross…yuck, I’m not doing that (I see, of course….) oh did I mention that my eyes are very dry so I can only have very moist lenses or I’ll be scratching my eyes out with rubbing? What about Accuvue moist daily? I don’t like them because they swim around my eyes and I can only wear them for 12 hours. As was iterated several times during this 15 mind appointment, I am indeed the contact lens optician’s dream!! We’ll see what they can come up with for me – like a magical spell that makes me see properly without having to do anything to my eyes, or that requires keeping my glasses on my face rather than on top of my head!

btw. two days later I have developed some kind of blister type cyst effort on the inner lower lid….if she infected my eye I’m not gonna be best pleased. coincidence? or conspiracy?

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