Cockchafers, arachnophobia and quilting


What do they got?
A lot of sand?
We got a hot crustacean band!

Ah – Sebastian the crab, how I loved to sing along to those little mermaid songs in my childhood. Don’t know what  I’m talking about?
under the sea
Now you do!

I’m still pretty chuffed about going to the Boston aquarium again…can you tell?

Now. I expect you’ll be wondering what a cockchafer is…or…you’ll be imagining something that chafes one’s manhood, and I am here to tell you that it’s the name of a nocturnal scarab beetle, common in East anglia, and not a crude Nickname that I’ve aquired! The name probably means common gnawing beetle, according to Google anyway. I found one of these guys in the bathroom laying on its back having an afternoon nap…nudged to make sure it was alive, then gently ejected it out of the window…he might have a sore head when he wakes up tonight and wonder exactly  how much toilet water he drank to mean he didn’t remember leaving his hotel room.

He was no problem though, a dopey, sleepy harmless beetle.

Not like the killer arachnid that I found earlier on. That guy was definately deadly. I mean, it was clearly the ussain bolt of the spider world and macho with it…I’m still getting chills when I think about it…it was 28 degrees and I had goosebumps. I thought I’d go with the classic pint glass, card and out the window trick, and just about managed to slip the card underneath his legs without passing out but I’m not kidding when I say I think that bastard was on steroids. I’ve not seen a spider that big be so quick before and it freaked me the hell out….I spent nearly an hour going over, moving the glass a bit and seeing if my eight-legged prisoner had calmed down yet but he was still pumped. At one point I worried that he was actually biting his way through the cardboard…but I think he was having a drink from some of the residual water from the glass ( do spiders drink? I guess so or they’d dehydrate, right?)  Around this time I realised the following:

1. I could not pick it up without it going Bat-shit crazy
2. I couldn’t kill it without at some point either picking it up or allowing a gap to allow his escape
3. I didn’t want to kill it, it had trapped a greenfly for me

And most importantly

4. My boyfriend wouldn’t go anywhere near it when he got home so waiting wouldn’t solve anything.
5. Or worse, he might kill it in a horrific way, he previously killed one by drowning in boiling water then mashing it up on the bottom of the sink, leaving me the carcass to deal with 😦 I don’t like arachnids but I won’t kill them unless I can see no other way.

I finally plucked up the courage to pick the glass+cardboard prison up, walked the endless few metres to the window and threw the bugger out, snapping the window shut behind him and waiting for my heartrate to calm the hell down. I’m going to guess that when it finally came to transit time, spidey knew his bravado wouldn’t get him anywhere and that the epic battle for the black fleece blanket had been lost. He stood still and practically sulked. And to add insult to injury I put the blanket immediately in the washing machine.

I’m still jumpy and feeling weirdly itchy and crawly…

Everybody loves a good heatwave don’t they?

Now onto the arts and crafts section of this entry!
I went to new Hampshire and I learnt to quilt.
Exhibit A


Beautiful eh? Hang on, I’ll show you the back too


It’s Meant to have frayed edges around each square. Apparently you are supposed to pick random bits of fabric but I preferred to do something more planned (or boring).

Don’t ask me what it IS that I made, only that it’s 50% denim, but I will say that if you were after something with which to chafe your nether regions, then I guess it would do the job.


One thought on “Cockchafers, arachnophobia and quilting

  1. Ha! Really funny. And I like how you brought it full circle. I went to the Boston aquarium but they were under construction at the time so it was a little disappointing. Still good though.

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