Well, chaps, I’m feeling distinctly average, and so, feeling thus, I shall overuse commas

Today I’m feeling grossly banal. Not only have some exceptionally unflattering conference photos been released, but I’ve also got medium sized calves and am devoid of unique ideas.
Ok the first two don’t sound too disastrous do they, but I have bouts of paranoia about body image and I had rather thought that at that conference that I looked perfectly ok, good even, more polished than usual. I think we all know that scientists are not renowned for their dashing good looks,  so I hoped I might be in the upper quartile on a good day, but what I see in the mirror never lives up to the horror that photography can consistently capture. Next time I’ll be sure to wear a cardi, try and keep my number of chins under control and actually consider hair styling products :S

As for the calf sizing, well I bought myself some half chaps, loveson fleece lined ones as you are asking, and was somewhat surprised to find that I would need a medium adult size. Now don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with being medium, it’s just that it comes, to me, with the connotation of being average. My calves are adequately normal and altogether unremarkable. On a plus, during rides, in addition to this, they will also be warm.
Ok so this isn’t about my calves. It isn’t even about the photos. It’s my boss.

We have these discussions together, about things like mechanisms and possible experiments and modeling and hypotheticals…only…I think I’m being used. She was stuck coming up with a new project until we had a lengthy chat wherein I was the catalyst for her great idea. I think she’s using me like a mascot or something because for two days running all I seem to hear from her are along the lines of:

Obviously
Thats the first thing I thought
I thought of that already

Etc

Honestly, if she doesn’t want my run-of-the-mill ideas that she has already thought of (due to quite significantly higher intelligence), then why not have the decency to say she just wants me to nod and agree with her (probably knows I’d disagree on principle) Not that I see much weight in the opinion of someone seemingly incapable of unique or useful thoughts. I suppose that even people of lesser intellect and or experience can occasionally be useful, and therefore it’s worth keeping them feeling like you care about what they think. But what when the veil slips eh?

“Just the beating of hearts,
Like two drums in the grey”

PS if you ever find a nice photo of me, rest assured it’s either heavily photoshoped, or someone else.

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One thought on “Well, chaps, I’m feeling distinctly average, and so, feeling thus, I shall overuse commas

  1. Ha funny last line. Yo I hope you get your paranoia under control. Also, sounds like your boss is lame, you should tell her really weird ideas and then accuse her of having amyloidosis. Also steal her brown bag from the break room.

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