building confidence is a bit like a 3d puzzle of a horse. It may seem impossible but once you get a few pieces in place you start to see some hope!
Each day I shall try to think of and post one thing that is good about myself. I missed two days so far so I’d better have three for today! If I flounder then suggestions are always welcome!
Today I had my first driving lesson for over 7 years and I was terrified. I literally had to check which order the pedals were before I went…I was shaky and before pulling away from the curb, dyslexia got the better of me abd I tried to indicate using the windscreen wipers! Several horrific gear changes and jolting stops later, I learned that is picked up a bad habit of riding the clutch…tried to rectify but it feels very weird to me to put the brake down without the clutch…I mean…im gonna stall, surely! And…I nearly did…that was the one time the instructor almost used a dual control pedal so im pretty darned proud of that. Less proud of missing second gear and chugging into 4th going over speed bumps and also less proud of my outright denial that we should be going onto a dual carriage way…or around big scary roundabouts….but….I got a good calm instructor who took no shit and said yes he was sure, it would be fine. And. It was! Incredible. I felt great arriving at home and managing to park in our tight parking space in a controlled manner. I even tackled the dreaded going around cyclists (SO tells me that I AIM for them rather than avoid but I showed no signs of this when with a calmer passenger…) I was complimented on how much smoother my driving had become in a matter of mins….I have to admit it’s a bit embarrassing feeling the need to say ‘sorry!’ every time I jolt, judder or otherwise jar the poor car. I booked a second hour for Sunday morning at 8am. Who does that? Who gets up at 7 on a Sunday? Meh. Have to get up at 7 on Monday do might as well get a practise in.
Day one: I continually strive to be a stronger, better person.
Day two: I can regrout tiles quite neatly
Day three: I tackled my fear of driving and took my first refresher lesson.