Protected: I must be a terrible person

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My trusty (ok not so trusty) stead!


He still needs to get some condition on him. His ribs are a bit too visible abd his top line and neck muscles are slowly improving. Mel on the other hand needs to lose some condition!

He is NOT impressed about wearing a flash noseband.
Please bear in mind that Casper is 28-29 years old and although a bit underweight he is well fed and healthy so no need to think he’s a poor malnourished sickly boy though I know if I saw someone else’s horse looking this way, thats what I’d be worried about…

He was really good today ūüôā spent the first 30 mins staring at melly of I made him walk alongside rather than behind. He did some lovely shoulder-in exercises when I was actually asking him to move across ( funny, he never does shoulder in at a canter when I ask him to!) one of us has our signals incorrectly wired! We had two arguments about the direction we were riding in. (both times he wanted to turn for home, surprise surprise!) but I was firm ūüėČ we had quite a few canters, only the first stretch of the first was a bit hairy buy then he took up the contact again and all was good. He gets so excited bless him, so at the end of a two hour ride I gave him the reins and said off you go, I’ll just sit whatever you feel like doing, and he shook off any remaining cobwebs with a brisk but not silly canter ( I would have let join gallop if he was up for it) and by the end he was tiring, we did a canter-trot-canter-trot transition change and he responded impeccably! I can barely beleive this is the same horse who mere weeks ago, was uncontrollable and scary at a canter (and who tried rearing up on our last ride) such a good boy. I’m proud that we are bonding and learning to work together. It’s a very satisfying feeling ūüôā

What makes people attractive?

2012-11-23 20.13.47

As I wandered past the opticians I was thinking – what makes people attracted to one another? what qualities to I consider attractive and subconsciously use to assess people? (I’m not just talking partners here I mean friends too)

Why the opticians? well – you see – um – I think the manager of the branch is cute – I don’t know why…he’s not super stunning looking I just always liked him since I first went to that opticians. I could envisage a world where he and I were friends and went out for coffee every now and then or something like that. I rarely get this feeling for acquaintances and for any connection to happen the other person has to feel something similar AND the circumstances have to be appropriate.¬†

so what do I look for in a companionable human?

honesty, self-confidence, generousity, forgiveness, passion, spontaneity, appreciation, independence, fun /a sense of humour (laughing and smiling), expressiveness, imagination, acceptance

right – so if you are reading this (assuming you are someone I sent this link to and not someone who found it by google search or something) then the above apply to you. Woohoo! you made it through the subconscious selection process ūüôā

what makes humans non- companionable for me (come on thesaurus- do your magic)?

deceit, overly self-consciousness, miserliness, holding grudges, indifference, restriction / controlling nature, disregard, dependence / neediness, over-seriousness / grumpiness / never smiling, uncommunicative, tediousness, criticism

yup – those people tend to get swiftly sifted out of my life because I fund their influence very negative and destructive. Well I found that a useful exercise – considering qualities and their antonyms. what about you? what qualities do YOU look for in people?


obviously I had to state that I means human because the first thing I look for in a companion is usually four legs and fur ūüėõ


oh and more

I forgot to say – when packing our sainsburys shop into our environmentally friendly reusable bags I found a packet of lovehearts that I had forgotten i got on the last shop ūüôā sweet!

then I got to thinking what if they were HATE hearts or singledom hearts not LOVE hearts – I shall transpose their messages as I munch my way through the packet….

just anyone but you


My voodoo Doll

For never

hard luck – oh wait that one can stay

don’t try me

I surrender to no-one

my all bile

ok that’s enough I’m getting toothache!


A word of advice ladies – when cycling in daylight, you would do well to ensure that you are wearing correctly fitting undergarments – of the strapped variety and not just think ‘oh it’ll be fine….’. It ¬†might not….

So I have managed to get SO some gifts, not sure if they will go down well or not but at least I tried. All of the card shops nearby are terrible. Really bad – I couldn’t bring myself to buy any of them but now I look like I didn’t care cos I haven’t got a card..well maybe the hospital gift shop will come up trumps?

Today I have done some annoying bill and bank related things, gone into town etc and listened to emilianas new album over and over. ¬†You know what I haven’t done? tha muthafuckin washing up! that’s right – I’m revelling in my opportunity to share my flat with dirty dishes rather than clean ones. Lazy? Unhygenic? oh sure – whatchagonna do about it?

blissful calm and grounded sanity. Good Lord! I just re-read and this was appallingly written. my apologies.will try better next time!

AND I can have teriyaki chickpea stirfry with singapore noodles without anyone complaining at me (or stealing half of my chocolate cupcake) – I’m feeling confident that my weight should be up a bit this week and that’s just fine with me (questionable cycling incidences notwithstanding)

Ah you remember that colleague of mine – the unfaithful one? well a mere three weeks after her wedding she is complaining that she is really miserable at the moment. So that’s what she got for marrying the man she ‘was in love with’ i’m sure none of us could see that coming – if you have just married the most central important and amazing person in your life then surely that would obliterate any negativity you might have in any other areas of your life? just sayin…

Autumn sun and other things


“Now I see the beauty

I failed to see

when she was me.

Life undressed me of her strip by strip.”

“I used to watch the sparrows

perched on electric wires,

like notes of a song

waiting to be sung.”


Naww Emiliana Torrini has a new album coming out “Tookah” – GO BUY IT! It’s a cute combination between the styles of fisherman’s woman and love in the time of science. (skipping that questionable side step in the previous album). As you can see from the above, I’m in love with the track Autumn Sun. Don’t want to wait for the release? you can stream it here…

A delicious blend of electronica, acoustic folkiness and her usual quirky cuteness.

Home uses a very unusual time signature, ¬†13/8- I don’t remember ever heard a song using this but it works really well once you know what’s coming, otherwise every phrase feels disjointed.

Other topics on my mind:

Ooh yesterday i got some bakery counter items (you know – the type of thing that should come with a type II diabetes warning sticker) but the (chinese?) lady decided to give me a free belgium bun – then proceeded to tell me about her eye problem – she said she had a problem with her tear ducts – they don’t produce tears so every morning she has to put a million eye drops in each eye and she went to her doctor and was referred to the specialist who told her she musn’t cry any more – but she said he doesn’t know how hard it is for a foreigner in this country, so the take home message was that she musn’t cry any ore – and also she told me I was not to cry ūüôā (funny – I suspect i was looking smug rather than teary having just go t a free pastry) But she is right – I didn’t quite understand her story or why she found it so hilarious, but I’m sharing it so maybe someone can elighten me.

btw Рtrying to work out what nationality she might have been (not that it mattered) I found this

infact this guy¬†¬†has merged thousands of images to find what the ‘average’ face of each nation looks like! I don’t know about you, but I find that quite fascinating! although if this is true then I look more french that English.

Anywhooos – we took out our summer student for dinner and a drink to mark his leaving the lab (finish, very introverted) and he told me how glad he was that he came to out lab and not the others that he applied to (who rejected him) because he couldn’t imagine having a better experience in the lab. Nawwww and I was supervising him :). I am clearly the best student supervisor ever (for projects <8 weeks) ha!

whatelse? well SO has gone to see rugby with his friend in twickenham, so I get to be alone at home (Wooohoooo!!) but it was a struggle to get him out the door – he was being all weird and clingy and whinging that he didn’t want to go – that boy sure needs to learn to be a bit more independent.

Also a collaborator leaked some info (MY WORK) about our current problem manuscript in his latest review which may or may not have consequences for our submission – but it’s ok because he stated personal correspondence with my boss and he THOUGHT our paper would be published by the time the review came out. erm. Is that really ok? y’know I’m not sure it is.


is that all?

that is all.






So um sleeping on the sofa huh?
How did this happen?
SO has some forearm pain which is seemingly the end of the world and requires him to take up the entire bed.


I remember when I broke my wrist I was the one to sleep on the sofa so I wouldnt disturb SO.

Had many good and much more worthwhile things to say but this is occupying my immediate thoughts.

Is it a massive overreaction to golfers elbow or is it angina, or a blood clot. I cant think of anything else that could possibly be so painful there without breaking a bone or ripping a muscle.

I daresay it will disappear by Thursday when he’s next scheduled to play golf.

Come on then sofa, lets start this unhappy ans uncomfy union of ours which is surely doomed to end in yawns.

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